Monday, November 30, 2009

God's Gift to me this Holiday Season

This Holiday Season is turning out to be a bit different then all the rest for me. In a great and terrible way! Anyone with me? Family, family, them or not really love them, they "belong" to us! But does that mean that we HAVE to actively participate in what we think we should be doing? So that our family is "normal" and we do what "normal" families do for the holidays?

In my own personal circle, people who have mean streaks in them (one person actually) is actively participating in her own selfish out-lashing. This is causing a physical separation between 4 generations..... as seemingly sad as this is, I have to say that after about a week or so of reflection and not even a phone call on Thanksgiving from family that lives 10 minutes away.... I'm ok with it!

Let me tell you why. My life has consisted of longing for and looking for love... and from my background and perspective, this void should have been filled by my parents. Hence, all of my thoughts, actions, words, energy has been put towards creating a relationship with my father and his girlfriend (of 15 years that he hasn't married). Although I would never choose her as a friend of mine, my quest for "family" has put me through all kinds of unnecessary drama (I'm sure that none of you have ever suffered this). Well, she has thrown another one of her "fits"(consisting of "I'm not speaking to you and I'm going to say all sorts of mean things about you to your father"), and for the first time, I'm not torn into pieces, and wallowing in the fact that I am not "celebrating the holidays" with my birth father and his partner.

Instead, I am choosing to see this as God's hand in bringing me out of the illusion that I need a close, loving relationship with my parents to be happy, complete, fulfilled, whatever you want to call it. After all, I can only control me and my actions, not those of others. I believe that God has a plan for me and is assisting me in not putting my time, energy, and talents into relationships that are not beneficial for me or my husband and children. This event has opened my eyes to the fact that I don't need to do what I've always done, simply because I've always done it. We grow, we change, our lives change and our priorities change and today I am thanking God for opening my eyes to a healthier, happier holiday season with those people that I really love and care about and am not just obligated to "love"!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

History in Our Public School

I learned so much about Christianity from my son's 6th grade history book (sarcasm intended). The chapters were on the rise and fall of the Roman Empire.  Who knew that Christian zealots conquered the Roman Empire and Jesus was arrested for treason?  He was an outspoken political figure speaking out against the government.  All I can say is Wow!  The book also outlined other religions that surfaced at the same time as Christianity.  The one that also brought hope and was the same as Christianity was Muslim.  Mohammad and Jesus similar leaders of the people. 

I couldn't believe what I was reading.  My son and I actually chuckled a little going over the information.  After I absorbed the seriousness of the text I felt saddened and blessed at the same time.  Blessed because my son knew the Truth and saw through the lies.  Saddened because most of the kids in his class were hearing these "facts" about Christianity and believing them.  The school was actually teaching a false Jesus and a false Truth.  It is not a coincidence this lesson immediately followed their lesson on evolution.  Do I think that the teachers had an agenda to sway the minds of these kids? No.  What it sounded like to me (coming from my son) the teachers were just as clueless and mislead.  They didn't know the Truth.  And believe me when I say, "someone" has an agenda.

Sisters in Christ know the Truth.  Read and study God's Word.  Teach your kids.  Nothing is more important than knowing Truth as a family.  Do your children know who Jesus is?  What He did for them?  Do they know that the God of Abraham is their God too?  Do they know that they were chosen before the foundation of the world?  Do they know their God?  Do you as a family believe God?

Get to know your God and read His Word.  If you don't teach them, "someone" will. 

Just a thought.......

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Learning From Autism

I have just written a children's book that describes a relationship between an autistic boy and a typical little girl. I love this story because it is near and dear to my heart.  The little girl I describe is my daughter Jessie and the boy is her best friend Jesse.  The main reason I wrote this book was to teach each and every child to  truly understand how much we can learn from children with special needs. 

There are people out there that view children with special needs as useless or without value.  Doctors may use this perspective as an excuse to give counsel for terminating a pregnancy.   My dear readers I wish I could give you a glimpse at the transformation Jesse Boy has made on my children's lives.  Even though they are not perfect (he doesn't have super powers) but because of Jesse they are more compassionate, they befriend the special needs child in school, they have patience and they understand that God made them for a reason.

Both my daughters have a special needs child in their class.  Jessie, my fourth grader, asks "Mike" to sit by her at lunch and invites him to play with her at recess.  Her teacher says she is the only one who can sit by "Mike" and not complain.  The teacher even forgets that she needs to monitor him because Jessie has taken over the job to guide him and redirect him.  Jessie didn't need to be coached or trained, because she "gets it".  She is now explaining to her friends how to understand with him and how to be apart of his life. 

My youngest daughter, Becca, is in kindergarten and has a child in her class that can be really difficult because of her special needs.  Becca came home the other day and said "Hayley" hit her hard in the stomach.  I knew this child so I explained that "Hayley" was like Jesse Boy and she doesn't mean to hit, she is just trying to make friends.  But because she learns different she is not sure how to play and make friends.  Once she made the connection that "Hayley" was just like Jesse Boy she had a totally different attitude toward her.  The next day she asked to play with "Hayley" at recess and used her words if she thought she was being too rough.  It worked.  She "gets it". 

I could never have taught my children how to understand special needs kids if it wasn't  for our best friend Jesse Boy.  People with special needs are really just people who, if given the opportunity, can transform your life.